Sunday, February 25, 2018

What Ifs

So the Florida school shooting is unfolding a little more each day.  Now we know that there were a lot of failures that led up to this.  The FBI was warned and did nothing.  Heck, that information didn't even make it to the local field office.  The local police had visited his home multiple times for complaints about his behavior. The threat from this young man was openly known to say the least.

Now we find out the armed school resource officer didn't go into the building when shot rang out.  We also know that there were other deputies arrived and didn't go into the building.  These deputies failed in their duties.  The core tenet of their job is to serve and protect, and they didn't get 50% of that statement done.  Could they have made a difference?  Could they have saved lives if they went in at the first sound of gunfire?  Maybe, maybe not.  We will never know.  What I will say is that I can't judge these men.  I've never been shot at.  I'll defer to those who have to make that judgement.

Back to the point of this post.  Nothing that I've said above made a difference.  It's all just finger pointing and fake outrage.  "If these people would have done their job then none of this would have happened." All of those dead kids and teachers won't come back because of "could of, should have, would have". 

This is the way we choose to deal with things.  We place blame.  We blame the gun.  We blame the shooter.  We blame the systems that failed.  Unfortunately none of this gets us any closer to a solution to keep these tragedies from happening again.  It's no wonder we lose interest in these things after such a small amount of time.  All we get is confusing information about what could have been, not what it is.

So now what?  Do we provide better training for law enforcement?  Do we arm teachers?  Do we ban scary looking guns?  Do we fund better mental health and tie that back into background checks for gun purchases?

I don't know the answers to that.  What I do know is that, at some point, things will change.  For better or for worse.  And we had better get off our collective asses and get involved in the conversation.

If we don't, then we, and our values, will surely be left behind.

Sunday, February 18, 2018

The BS

Do you know what I've seen this week?  A whole lot of bullshit.  I see it in my facebook feed, I see it in the news, I hear it coming from peoples mouths.  And I can't believe everyone is willing to post this crap, or believe it, without once looking to see if it's right or wrong.

There were a couple of really good ones I keep seeing everywhere.  One is that there have been 18 school shootings this year.  The other is that school shootings just started in the last 30 years.  Both are absolute bullshit.  There have not been 18 school shootings of the kind we saw in Florida this year already.  And 52 years ago Charles Whitman stood on top of a tower and the University of Texas and killed 14 people and wounded a whole lot more.

So why lie?  What put a bunch of false, or at best partially true, information out there?  I'm guessing it's because there is a whole lot of power and money involved on both sides.  And the more they get us worked up and fighting with each other the more money they make.  Just look at the numbers.  If people even start talking about gun control then guess what happens.  Guns start flying off the shelf.  NRA membership sky rockets.  Money flows into Washington by lobbyists on both sides.  It's a vicious cycle.

Exactly how are we supposed to have a real conversation about this when all we get is half truths, or flat out lies.  How can we hope to fix this if we all aren't talking about what the same thing?  If we are cherry picking the facts to suit our personal beliefs, then where does that leave us?  We need to accept that fact that we are right and wrong, all at the same time.  We need to check our egos and beliefs at the door, and really listen to each other.  It really is that simple.  It's the base from where we can all start to really talk about solutions.

I have kids in school.  I can't imagine what those families are going through.  Burying their kids, fathers, friends.  I sure as hell don't wish that on anyone.  Including myself.

Thursday, February 15, 2018

Another Shooting

Another school.  17 people, as of now, dead.

I've seen all the headlines.  I've checked on facebook.  I know that the lines have been drawn.  Hell, I know which side most of my friends will choose.

You'll either be on the side of no more AR-15 type assault weapons.  Or on the side of it's a mental health crisis and that has nothing to do with law abiding gun owner.

Both are true.  And both are completely bullshit.

An AR-15 is nothing more than a semi-automatic rifle that is spruced up to look like the military version.  You can do just as much damage with any semi-automatic firearm.  The only difference would be the look.  There are currently more than 100 million guns and over a trillion rounds of ammunition in private hands.  The genie is out of the bottle, and unless you start raiding homes like a police state, there is no way to get it put it back in.  And any politician or public personality that says anything about confiscation is pandering, because they know it won't happen.  Not for a long time. 

And for all of us saying it's a mental health issue, you're absolutely right.  The shooter in Florida was adopted.  He lost his adopted father in 2004 and lost his mother last November.  He and his sibling were living with friends.  Oh, and as icing on the cake, he was put on meds to help him cope.  Do you really think that kid was evil?  I can't say that for certain, but he was dealt a bad hand from the start.  He had more trauma in his young life than most.  Is that an excuse?  No.  Because a lot of people have trauma and don't shoot up schools.  I don't know, maybe he wanted to feel like God for a moment.  At least what he thought God feels like.

So where does that leave us?  Unfortunately I think it leaves us in the same place we've been after every one of these.  People are going to try to use this to push their own agenda.  Someone will call for more gun control.  The NRA will scream about the constitution.  Same old same old.


If it really is about mental health, then why isn't the NRA putting out grants to put counselors back in schools?  Or supporting programs to help young men who are troubled.  Why aren't we doing anything but screaming about our rights?  What about the rights of those dead kids and their families?  I didn't pull the trigger, but I sure as hell haven't done anything to try to fix this.

We gun owners had better start having a conversation about this, and we had better start bringing solutions to the table.  If we don't, then someone who doesn't share our values about firearms will.  And when that happens, at some point, our voices will be drown out.




Saturday, February 10, 2018

What you wish for

Not to long ago I wrote a post about turning 45 and feeling like I'm running short on time.  In that same post, I was commenting about how I shouldn't complain.  Good job, etc.  Not long after that I was talking to my wife about how my office wasn't getting support from our main headquarters and I remember saying that a few different things could happen.  We would be successful and they would be forced to support us or they would fire us.

Well guess what.  There was a third option.  We started being successful, and they called us and told us they were shutting the office down. 

Be careful what you put out there folks.  Of course my wife was not shocked.  At all.  She just said "Well you did put it out there"

So now what?  No idea.  I have plenty of options.  But I'm back to what do I want to do.  And I still really don't have an answer.  Luckily for me I have some time to sort it out.  It's not like they locked the door and  changed the keys on us.  I still have about a month and a half of work left before they formally close our office.

In my younger years I would probably have freaked out at this.  But I haven't.  Maybe it's because I'm confident in my ability to get work if I need it.  But I don't seem to have that gut wrenching fear of what will happen to us.

This just happened yesterday, so maybe it hasn't hit me yet.  But to be honest it feels pretty liberating.  Like I'm standing in a room and there's a million doors standing open.  I just have to walk through one and see where it takes me.  I could do a complete 180 on my career right now, and still be fine.

So once again, what's next?  No idea.  I have some opportunities I'm looking into, but nothing solid yet.  I guess I'll see what the universe brings to my door.  I know whatever it is, I'll have to work for it. 

I'll keep my eyes and my heart open.  My next great thing is coming next, I just need to recognize it when it gets here.

Monday, February 5, 2018

Change

I heard someone say, and I'm paraphrasing here, "If you want your life to change, then you have to let you life change."  That seems really obvious when you read it.  But practical application of that, at least for me, seems to be a little tricky.

I expanded on that thought a little more just for myself.  I added the following at the end.  "You can't fear change that you've asked for."

What that means, at least to me is, that fear is holding me back.  The "What ifs" are shackles.  What if it fails, what if it's stupid, what if I'm just being a jackass.

I'm absolutely positive that a multitude of opportunities have passed right on by me.  Some of them I realized were actually really good ideas and possibilities.  Do you know how many I've acted on?  Almost none.

I can sit here and say I wasn't ready.  I can sit here and say it wasn't the right opportunity.  Both of those are flat out lies.  The truth would be that I never really tried.  Whether I let the opportunities go because of fear, or laziness, or a multitude of other reasons, take your pick.

None of the excuses I make up matter.  I can say whatever I want to appease my conscience.  But the truth is I that I have had a multitude of opportunities and did nothing.  I could have put some effort into seeing if they could become a reality.  But I didn't.

You see, I got comfortable. I quit pushing myself.  I can blame fear, but why?  It's just another excuse.  The fact is, my brain routinely betrays me.  It thinks I'm doing just fine.  It's comfortable.

So now, I need to make a change.  I need to explore a few opportunities that have come my way.  I have to look at myself, and tell that part of my brain to shut up.  I need to go out and start pushing myself again. 

If I want change then I have to let change happen every time I get the opportunity.